08/09/2014

Archive // Body Image & Self Confidence v1

Every so often, I'll be posting old posts from my old blog. Mainly because I'm a little bit too disorganised for regular posting, but also because some of the posts I wrote still have some sort of meaning today. After my last post about trying to get fit and lose weight, I thought the this post, and the follow up, were rather appropriate. And so....

**Instead of having a hugely long post, I'll break this up into two separate posts. I didn't think I had much to say on the topic, but it seems I do! Everything I've said here is written from a personal point of view but anyone could adapt it to themselves. Nearly everyone at some stage or another has received hurtful comments and it's just a case of realising, at the risk of sounding like a Bruno Mars song, you're perfect just the way you are**

While shopping earlier today, I got a comment from a fellow shopper. She pointed at the garment I was holding and asked whether I thought a "big girl" like me should wear "something like that". It got me thinking. This time last year, a comment like that would have left me devastated. But this year, not so much. Granted, I'm still shocked and a little upset at a virtual stranger saying something like that, but it hasn't been the first time I've been at the receiving end of comments like that. I've not grown used to it by any means, but I try not to let it bother me so much now. Being chubby is not the end of the world.

Not being the skinniest girl alive does not make me a bad person. It's not really a big deal. So I've got curves? I still manage to have friends, a job, some sort of a social life, a wardrobe bursting at the seams with lovely clothes. My weight used to be such a big deal to me. I thought that as the weight crept up, people would lose interest in me. That guys wouldn't find me attractive anymore. But that was just being silly. Who I am isn't dictated by the size of my clothes. Saying that, I'm also not just tattoos and piercings. I am me. I am the personality inside this body. I learnt the hard way that if you wear your insecurities on the outside, that is when people will start to pass you up. They'll say no to you because you're so involved in the "issue" of your weight that you can't see the bigger picture. What I'm saying is; be proud of who you are. Find comfort in your body because I honestly believe that you can't no one can love you until you learn to love yourself.

So much focus today is put on weight for girls. It's insane! People don't focus on what a person is capable of, and instead focus on the size on the tag of the clothing they're wearing. I'll admit, some days I'm guilty of doing the same thing, but once a person is healthy, and, more importantly, happy, what's the problem? I spent years not being happy with my body. My knees are constantly giving me trouble, my teeth are permanently discoloured from medication I was taking for years, I have loads of scars that I used to hate. But then I realised; this is the body I have. And I may as well grow to love it. I can walk, run, jump, skip, swim, sleep, eat, breathe. It's perfectly functional. What else can I ask for?

If I was going to starve myself down to skin and bone to fit in, I wouldn't really be happy. I've done the size 8 thing before, and it's just not me. Sure, I could wear clothes and not worry about all my lumps and bumps. I could wear sleeveless things without worrying that my bingo wings were jiggling. But I couldn't eat that cupcake without feeling guilty. I'd miss what little boobage I have (when I was smaller, I was a 32AA, now I'm a B cup. It's still small, but miles away from being almost concave!). Hell, I'd miss most of my curves. Not all of them mind, but I like not looking like a stick figure.

How do you feel confident when you're not particularly happy with how you look?

8 comments:

  1. What a fucking c*nt!! WHO SAYS THAT TO A STRANGER?! I'm so angry on your behalf. Thankfully you have a healthy outlook so it didn't do damage but that person didn't know you and could have been inflicting a mental wound. What a horrible person!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I'm so glad you like my tutorials! I feel the same way sometimes, and believe me, some of my items get messed up too. I just learn from it and move one.

    Crafty Pirate

    ReplyDelete
  3. Haha.. your post is about boosting self-esteem and mine was about destroying it. How funny!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Thankyou so much for that! And that is absolutely ridiculous that a complete stranger would say that to you! Hell, I'd probably be upset if ANYBODY said that to me, aside from my mother. People these days. But it's so true about people being so consumed with their body weight, unless it's to the point where they're unhealthy. Love this!
    xoxo,
    Jessie

    http://sweetlilsomethings.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete
  5. People just need to love themselves.

    I look like a boy from the back LOL. There is nary a curve on me at all ..from my bum to my boobs. The only thing with any substance is my hair.

    I would KILL for some womanly curves. Rock what you got lady :) Embrace, I say.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Jesus Christ - I can't believe someone said that to you! I'm really happy you're posting something positive about body image. I've been dying to do a post on it, but have totally slacked. I admire your confidence! I don't know why women let the media and other women bring us down about how we look. Not everyone can (or should) be a size 0. As long as you are healthy and happy with who you are - that should be enough.

    I also think that women love to bring other women down because most of the times I've felt awful about my body, it was from another girl. Every guy I've ever been with has loved my curves and never made me feel ashamed about them.

    ReplyDelete
  7. I cannot believe someone said that to you - who the hell does that!? If I ever heard someone being that rude they would get an absolute mouthful. Kudos to you for keeping your cool!

    P.S. Yay to a fellow Disney movie collector! I still need to hunt down some other old childhood favourites too.

    ReplyDelete
  8. That is so insanely rude. I'm kind of used to it though; in Asia people are very blunt when they say something. People who barely know you will ask all sorts of personal things. Like Katie said, good on you for keeping your cool. And it's awesome that you have such good body image; I'm pretty happy with the way I look but have off days like most other people.

    However, I accept it, since I could cure those 'issues' with a bit of toning exercise...except I like to lie in bed, read, and eat more cheese than anyone should be allowed.

    ReplyDelete